When You Feel You Failed At Lent

Sometimes the journey of Lent isn’t wrapped up nice in a devotional with morning coffee.

Sometimes it’s about living it.

About allowing your knees to get bloodied as you crawl broken to the cross just as you are.

About realizing surrender is self denial.  That everything you can’t control is what makes Him in charge.

Because “earth has no sorrow that heaven can’t heal.”

And that my friend is why we wait for Easter.

And why it’s OK when our Lent looks nothing like a neat packaged up meditational series of moments.  Perhaps those moments upon moments gasping for mercy….grasping for grace really are what journeying to the cross looks like.

A death to self…the reaching towards resurrection.

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Forty Days to Healing

We file in this broken lot of people marking the beginning of a journey.  For it all starts with ashes. From dust we came, and dust we are, and to dust we shall return. And I’ve never been more aware than now how broken I really am. How ill this heart is.  How in need I am of healing, and wholeness and salvation for I’ve been trying and striving and doing all I can to right this woundedness but the bleeding and tearing just won’t end. I need something, Someone greater who holds the salve of the soul. I want less of me and more of Him and maybe that’s what forty days of Lent is all about. A dying away of the old self and a coming to life anew. I want to journey to the cross with Jesus.

These fingers are playing “Nothing but the Blood” while with one voice we sing “What can wash away my sin?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus; What can make me whole again? Nothing but the blood of Jesus….” and this girl is at the end of herself for only He can save, only He can redeem and I am leaning hard into Him and it’s this prayer we’re praying that pierces the heart:

Merciful God, we come to You today realizing that we are not how You want us to be. Help us let go of our past, that we may turn toward You and live again the life of faith.  Help us call out our fear and hatred, our anger and self-pity. Lift the burden they place on our shoulders. Help us set aside our guilt and enter a season of healing.  As we pray and fast today, help us become simple people, that we may see You plainly.  As we wear the mark of ashes, rekindle the sign of hope within our eyes. Let us draw near to You now. Amen

Lent, a season of healing…a season of all things being made new.  May out of this mourning come repentance, a crown of beauty from ashes.  Even so Lord may it begin in me.